Shmirat Habrit is not a subject people can properly tackle on their own. Almost everyone involved with this subject says having a Rav, or counselor, or someone else to talk to about this sensitive and embarrassing problem is essential for success.

We received the following letter recently:

I have just found your web site and appreciate it very much. I would like to make a suggestion for an improvement.

One of the worst things about struggling with this urge is that there is no one to talk to. In my mind I would feel two forces, one of excitement, looking for ways to justify it and silence my conscience, and one of shame and misery, looking to escape from the compulsion, wishing it would go away.
The voice of my conscience really needed someone to talk to and support it, whether in the very throes of temptation or in the quiet periods between storms. I was far too embarrassed to tell someone else of my struggle, so I struggled alone.

My understanding of Alcoholics Anonymous' approach to rehabilitation is the presence of a mentor. This is someone who is presently controlling their addiction (they never say they are recovered, only recovering) and who is available at any time of the day or night to phone when the alcoholic feels the need to drink. The mentor will provide support for the desperate person based on his experiences, and simply the presence of an understanding person who has also been through what they are enduring will help the caller.

In absolute seriousness, an initiative for Tikkun HaBrit needs some kind of similar set-up. There are thousands of young men struggling out there who could give each other unimaginable chizuk if they would support each other.

 If you are qualified to give anonymous telephone support for people suffering, please send your contact information and a brief summary of your training to This e-mail address is being protected from spam bots, you need JavaScript enabled to view it